Prioritizing When Everything Is Important

You know that sinking feeling you have when there's too much on your plate? When you try to tackle your tasks by priority, but it feels like everything's important? Don't get overwhelmed—it's a problem that everyone faces at some point or another, and while it's difficult to skillfully juggle multiple priorities and competing responsibilities, it's not impossible. Here's how.

It just so happens that there's a career that focuses specifically on juggling competing tasks and priorities: These people are called project managers. And as luck would have it, I was a full time PM for many years, PMP-certified and everything. In that time, I learned a number of helpful tricks that can help you manage your workload at the office as well as your ever-growing list of to-dos at home, with your family, or with your friends. Here's how you can apply some of those techniques to your everyday life.

First, Answer the Question: Is Everything Really Important?

Even if everything on your plate is supposed to be equally important, you still need a way to break down which ones you spend your time on, and how you slice up your time. The first question you have to get past is whether or not everything really is of equal importance. Here are a couple of tips to help you cut through the fog and get a feel for how important your responsibilities and projects really are.

Ø  Grill the boss. At work, you have a manager. At home, you're your own boss. One of the primary responsibilities of any manager is to help you understand what's important, what's not, and what you should be working on. You may have a manager at the office who does this (or needs your help doing it well), but everywhere else, you're in charge of your own work, and no one's going to tell you that backing up your data is more important right now than painting the house. It's easy to give up and think "it's all important," but at work, you can lean in and tell your boss that you really need their help. At home, sometimes you just have to pick something from your to-do list and get started to build some momentum.

Ø  Ask around. If you're prioritizing tasks that involve other people, like your family, friends, and coworkers, talk to them. Find out from them when they need your help, how much work is backed up behind the things you're working with them on, and if they can lend a hand. If they don't need you for another week and someone else needs you tomorrow, or if they aren't as busy as you are, you know what to do.

Ø  Work backwards. We'll get into this a little more later, but you probably have an idea of when each of your tasks are due—or at least when you'd like them done by—and how much time is required to work on each item. Start with the due dates, take into account how much effort you need to put into each one and how much input you need from others, and work backwards to find out what you should be working on right now (or what you should have already started, in some cases).

Ø  Cover Your A**. Finally, once you've taken some time to determine what's really important and arranged them based on what you think you should tackle first, it's time to put it in writing and share it with everyone involved. Set expectations with others for when you'll get your work done for them, and set expectations with yourself for when you'll have time to work on your own projects. This is more important in a work setting, but involving others in your non-work to-dos can also keep you—and others—accountable.

Get Organized

In order for your priorities to even matter, you need to have some sort of a personal productivity system in place to which you hold yourself accountable—and in which your priorities will actually matter. If you've got a tried and true system, great.

The goal of your system, whichever you select, is to take away the need for you to waste time deciding what to work on next, even when you have a lot on your plate. I've found that David Allen's GTD framework is one of the most effective methods for me, mostly because it focuses on what you should do now and what your next actions should be, and it emphasizes getting your to-dos out of your head and into some system that will help you work. I've mentioned before that I manage my to-dos in ReQall, but there are plenty of other options, like previously mentioned Wunderlist, or if you work on a team, Asana, a collaborative tool we adore.

Whichever tool and productivity method you choose, dump your to-dos and projects into it as quickly as possible. Make sure it's something you'll actually return to and use frequently, and something that's easy to fit into your workflow, and you'll be successful. In the end, you want something easy to refer to, easy to enter tasks into, and that gives you a great view of all of the balls you have in the air at any time.

 

Behold, The Trinity: Cost, Scope, and Time

When I was a project manager, one of the first things I learned to help me judge which projects were most important or needed the most attention is the "triple constraint," or a triangle with three equilateral sides. Each side represents the cost of the project, the scope of the project, and the time required to complete the project. None of the sides can be adjusted without making changes to the other two sides. The sides you're weakest in help determine the projects that need special attention. This holds true for all things, not just projects and project managers: If someone heaps more work onto you (scope), but insists that you finish in the same amount of time (time), you'll need more resources (cost) to get the job done.

For example, if you want to paint the spare room in time for out-of-town guests to stay over, you can't change the size of the job (scope), but you can control whether you buckle down and do it yourself overnight (time), or get someone else to do it for you while you do something else (cost). Here's how you can use these three principles to organize your everyday to-dos.

Ø  Time: Work Backwards From Your Deadlines. Time is usually the one variable most of us can't change. Deadlines are deadlines, and often we're not the ones who set them. This is where working backwards from due dates is crucial. Start a spreadsheet, and mark down when each project or task on your plate needs to be finished. Then work backwards to the present day, taking into account everything each specific to-do that needs to be done to get from here to there, and how long it takes to complete. When you're finished, you'll likely see a bunch of tasks that should have started already and others that hopefully won't start for a while if you're going to make the deadline. That list, by itself, is a good indicator of what your priorities are, what you should be working on right now, what you should work on next, and perhaps most importantly, what you should get help with—especially if they're tasks that should have started a week ago.

Ø  Cost: Get Help from Family, Friends, and Coworkers. Cost means more than just dollars. It also means people who can help you, or services you can call to give you a hand or take the load off. Could you finish faster if someone else worked on it for you? What if a teammate could take part of the job off your hands and you could pick it up later? Perhaps there's a program or application that can automate the process for you, and it's pretty cheap. It may be worth spending money or dragging in friends to help you finish renovating the kitchen before you run out of vacation days, or calling someone to install your new washing machine so you don't have to take time off to do it.

Ø  Scope: Don't Be Afraid to Make Compromises. If your to-dos have to be done by a certain time and you can't get help, it's time to sit down with the people waiting on you and start making some deals. Let them know what you can deliver by when, and then go on to explain what you can give them later. This is important, because it sends the message that you're not trying to avoid the work you have to do, but you're trying to give them something now that they can use while you keep working in the background to get them everything else on their wish list. The sooner you stop thinking of your to-dos in terms of all-or-nothing, the sooner you'll have the flexibility to say "I'll give you this tomorrow if you give me a week to give you the rest."

Delegate, Delegate, Delegate

It's easy for us to toil away in obscurity, quietly hating our lives and our jobs and growing more frustrated with every passing minute. All the while, there may be a friend who's willing to help if we had only asked, or a boss who would be willing to help you out if you asked the right questions or gave them the right information.

We've talked about how difficult it can be to delegate, and how to delegate effectively in the past, but however you go about it, it's important to remember that you need to be assertive, not aggressive when asking for help, and you need to make your case with all of the data you have available. By now, you should have your priorities laid out and you have a good idea what you need. Use that information to ask for help and prove you need it, and remember, don't be upset if your friends, boss, or coworkers say no.

Buckle Up, It's Going to be a Bumpy Ride

Using this method to set your own priorities and keep track of your own responsibilities isn't just something you should do when you're starting to feel overwhelmed. If the walls are closing in on you, yes, it's definitely time to take a good, hard look at what's on your plate, what can come off, and what has to give, but waiting until you're already busy and stressed out will make it especially difficult to make the changes you need to get your head above water. Even so, it's essential, and once you do it you'll never look back. Hopefully, you can apply these tricks to your work, at home, and in your day-to-day life. Once you really understand what you have to work on and how long it takes, you'll be able to make smart decisions about whether you can take on that big new project at work, or help your best friend plan their bachelor party.

How to Manage Conflicting Priorities

In our complex, day-to-day lives, we have a multitude of priorities calling for our attention. Some call in a whisper. Others scream from the rooftops. And the soft voice of the things that we most long to accomplish is often drowned out by the fires and clamoring of these conflicting priorities.

No matter how good your time management structures and systems are, if you don’t figure out how to manage these conflicts, you will be hard-pressed to maintain those systems. So how do you decide where to spend your resources for the best outcome?

Have Clear Goals
It’s a funny thing – when I know exactly what my goals are, then evaluating and deciding which priorities to invest my time, energy and resources into becomes easier. When my goals are clear and specific with hard and fast deadlines – then I can decide which opportunities are in line with my goals and which are distractions.

It sounds simplistic, but it’s true.

When your goals are clear it becomes simpler to make decisions and it becomes easier to say “No”, because you know what you are saying “Yes” to.

Create Time Blocks
When you’ve got clear goals and you know what you’re saying “Yes” to, but you still are managing multiple projects and claims on your time, the best way I’ve found to organize my thinking as well as my time is by creating clear time blocks, even days, for each priority or project.

For example, if one of my priorities is working with another person on their priorities, I can say – “I’ve set aside Friday morning for you.” And I can clear my plate (and my email and phone) from those interruptions until it’s time.

Bottom line – multitasking doesn’t work. Study after study has shown that the more you are flitting from thing to thing, or doing two things at once, the less effective you are. By creating a specific block of time to work on a project, you can focus all of your mind, energy and resources to create a better result in less overall time.

And when the idea floats into your mind, “Oh, don’t forget to do X for that other project.” Just make a note and come back to it when it’s that project’s time.

Ask the Right Questions

Once you’re clear on your goals and you’ve created a schedule to accomplish those goals, that doesn’t mean new opportunities, other people’s needs or even ideas for new projects won’t come up for you. In fact, I’ve found the more effective I’m being; the more those things seem to happen. But you can evaluate and make choices about these new possible priorities by asking powerful questions:

Is this my urgency or someone else’s?

Very often, we will prioritize other people’s needs over our own. And when we try to resist that call, our inner critic starts in with the “Aren’t you being selfish?” message.

Look, your family and your loved ones are important. If you’re managing a day job in order to pay the bills – your boss and your job are important, too. But by always prioritizing other people’s needs or priorities over your own, you are actively destroying your own self-worth. You are saying, “I’m NOT worth it. I don’t matter.” And if you have children – you are teaching them to do the same.

So, get clear:
• Get clear on whose agenda you’re serving.
• Get clear on the consequences of saying “No.”
• Get clear on what the payoff for you is for saying, “Yes.”

Make sure that what you imagine is the consequence is actually real. (If I don’t take my sister to the airport, she’ll stop loving me… Really?) And be careful of the flattery payoff. Often when someone picks US to help them, we are flattered that they value our talents. But remember to value your own goals over their flattery. When all is said and done, you’ll have helped them achieve their goals while sacrificing your own.

Then make a choice and stand by it. You’re allowed to say, “No.” Remember, there are no right choices or wrong choices. There are only choices with varying consequences. Also remember, that we train people how to treat us. If you feel like your family doesn’t respect your goals, that’s because you’ve taught them not to. If you start respecting and prioritizing your goals, they will, too.

Does this project serve my goals? Which goal, specifically?

The clearer you are on which goal you’re serving, the easier it becomes to make a choice. And also where in your schedule to place it.

By spending time on this priority am I moving towards something? Or away from something else – perhaps a goal that brings up fear, considerations or obstacles?

Notice if you’re using another priority to avoid facing something. (I’m too busy to work on my music, because of yah de, yah de, yah de…)

Remember, there is no right or wrong choice. Each choice has consequences – some predictable and some not. The question, then, is:

Does this choice bring me closer to my goals and dreams?

Is this choice in line with my values and principles?

And finally – be realistic about how much time you actually have. Often when looking at projects or priorities, it’s better to think in terms of serial monogamy than polyamory. Doing one project at a time and doing it well will bring you closer to the life of your dreams than will working on multiple projects and not doing them as well, or never finishing them.

When looking at opportunities – remember that all opportunities aren’t your opportunity. And that we live in an abundant universe filled with opportunities. Don’t just say, “Yes” to this opportunity because it kinda sorta looks like what you want. You can say, “No.” It won’t mean that you will never have another opportunity. In fact, often you have to say, “No” to the mediocre opportunities before the Universe will start sending you the great ones.